‘I embrace dark as much as I embrace the light.’ I spoke to a really good friend yesterday and it got me thinking a lot! What are we afraid of? And really what is fear? I don’t like fire what so ever, but I adore candles! I’ve had to over time learn to brew ok using a long lighter stick, I couldn’t light a match if my life depended on it!
So fire is an element. Without fire we in theory have no light! We need it to stay warm and essentially cook food. Why am I so scared of an element we rely upon so heavily! It’s PTSD.. (Post traumatic stress disorder.) As a kid around about 7 I was held over a bonfire by a family friend! He thought it was funny! It was the embers after a bonfire we had when we were camping! I remember feeling the heat and the crackling embers, watching as they danced around me! It was not done maliciously I was probably being smart mouthed that part I can’t remember. To me as a child it was a big deal! I’ve never liked fireworks and can’t even hold a sparkler! The fear hit me when I was around 18, it became worse it was almost a delayed reaction! I would have nightmares about being thrown into a fire and this kind of relit the fear! I’d have massive anxiety around lighters! I’ve always hated cigarette ash! That is actually the thing I hate the most, I can’t touch it, I literally squirm! When I tried smoking as a kid or when I got drunk i would always make an excuse to get someone to light it for me! And I’d watch the cigarette like a hawk! I couldn’t imagine smoking now! Fire and ash my two biggest dislikes!
I’m slowly trying to figure the fire thing out, but I know I don’t think I’ll ever get over ash! I’m only human but there are so many people out there that have irrational fears, some people hate objects! Like buses or textures like sponge! It’s about thinking about these ‘fears’ in a different light! So I think about fire.. yes it can hurt you but what heats up my boiler up to keep me toasty warm? I could carry on!
I think of my fear and change it’s name into something I like a lot, So fire is a huge marshmallow. I could wrap myself in it keep warm and of course eat it! (Don’t recommend eating fire.. unless you’re a professional of course.) it’s enabled me to use the long lighter it’s controlled and that’s ok! I always make sure my candles are safe too! Very important!
Ok so take what you want from this and one of the parts of my training is going to look at irrational fears! And I’d like to work on this with clients once I’m trained.
Have a great morning!